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Ogden Nash

United States writer noted for his droll epigrams (1902-1971)

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A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

– Ogden Nash

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An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a man can hope for, Even then, no sooner has he learned how to cope with the tick than she tocks.

– Ogden Nash

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Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope.

– Ogden Nash

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Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

– Ogden Nash

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They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball.

– Ogden Nash

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If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.

– Ogden Nash

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Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

– Ogden Nash

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A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

– Ogden Nash

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A flea and a fly

– Ogden Nash

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And one of his partners asked Has he vertigo? and the other glanced out and down and said Oh no, only about ten feet more.

– Ogden Nash

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He without benefit of scruples His fun and money soon quadruples.

– Ogden Nash

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I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.

– Ogden Nash

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Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

– Ogden Nash

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Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.

– Ogden Nash

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Nietsche is Pietsche."

– Ogden Nash

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Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave When they think that their children are nave.

– Ogden Nash

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One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

– Ogden Nash

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People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.

– Ogden Nash

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People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

– Ogden Nash

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Progress might have been all right once but it has gone on too long.

– Ogden Nash

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Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long.

– Ogden Nash

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Progress might have been all right once, but it went on too long.

– Ogden Nash

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The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.

– Ogden Nash

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The Preacher, the Politicain, the Teacher, Were each of them once a kiddie. A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature. Do I want one? God Forbiddie!

– Ogden Nash

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To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it Whenever you're right, shut up.

– Ogden Nash

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To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.

– Ogden Nash

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When there are monsters there are miracles.

– Ogden Nash

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"Ogden Nash Quotes." Quotes.net. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Nov. 2024. <https://www.quotes.net/authors/Ogden+Nash+Quotes>.

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